Robert Heaven
BACP Accredited Psychotherapist / Counsellor
MBACP (Accred), UKRC, PG.Dip Psyc Couns, C.C.Cert (Relate), D.Arts, M.A, M.Sc

Counselling Cheltenham, Gloucester, Stroud, Cirencester area for individuals and Couples

I work with individuals and couples as a 'skilled helper" to assist them to resolve many of life's issues and problems. Below are answers and explanations to some of the questions people might have about Counselling, Psychotherapy and Relationship Counselling, (or Marriage guidance counselling as some people refer to it.)

Relationship Counselling / Marriage Guidance - how does it work?

Relationship counselling provides a safe space for you and your partner to explore thoughts, emotions, feelings, behaviours and how you interact with each other, so that you can understand better what is happening in your couple and what is causing it. This enables you to make sense of the situation as individuals, to communicate better with each other about it and gain a shared understanding from which you can more easily make decisions and make changes. Quite often clients report that is is a place where they are able to say things they need to say, and feel heard, in ways that somehow can't happen at home. Sometimes very significant events, issues or feelings that have been tacitly "ignored" by both partners for years, can surface for the first time and be thought about and processed together. This is often experienced by both partners as a great relief.

It is important to emphasise that relationship counselling is not about "making you" speak about things, nor about setting an agenda with a fixed "goal", rather it is about working respectfully and in support of you and your partner on the problems that you bring. The work can focus very much on the present, and un-learning unhelpful ways of interacting and learning new ones, to improve the situation. Alternatively, or in addition, it can draw on past experiences as a way of understanding the causes of the current feelings/ ways of behaving, on the path towards changing them. The methods of working are determined by the nature of the problem and your preferences in your couple.

What Situations Can it Help?

It can help the couple cope with/ resolve

breakdown in communications; constant arguing or feelings of gradually growing apart
facing difficult decisions together and the stresses resulting from them (around children, employment, money)
stresses of fertility problems; decisions and treatments
the impacts of crises on the couple; bereavements, affairs, sudden changes in circumstances
repeated patterns of problematic relating from past relationships
constructive endings of relationships that are coming to an end

What Benefits can be Expected?

At the end of the counselling you are likely to have a better understanding of the causes of your problems and greater ability to communicate with each other. You may have released yourselves from old relationship "habits" and learned constructive, new ones. You may also have a sense of relief, if you have unburdened secrets or aired long-term unspoken problems and worked on them together in the sessions. With these advances you may have resolved your problems, or be well on the way to resolving them or coping with them, and you are likely to have more skills and more space to develop good strategies for coping with problems in the future.


What does being an “Accredited Counsellor” actually mean?

Accredited counsellors are those who have undertaken an approved training; usually a post graduate Diploma in Counselling; have already completed several years' work with clients, and whose practice has been rigorously assessed by British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) or UK Council for Psychotherapy (UKCP) as having reached a proficient level.

Accredited Counsellors must undergo at least 30 hours of Continual Professional Development each year to maintain their accreditation which remains the benchmark of the competent, ethical practitioner. For more information on the criteria necessary for BACP Accreditation status, visit the British Association fo Counselling and Psychotherapy at www.bacp.co.uk


Will everything I say be treated as completely confidential?

Accredited Counsellors are bound by a strict Code of Ethics and will not reveal anything you say to anyone else without your specific consent. All Accredited Counsellors are required to have a supervision contract with a BACP accredited supervisor. The discussion that takes place between a supervisor and a counsellor is about cases, (without identifying the person involved).

The only time we would even consider that confidentiality has to be breached is if we thought there was a real danger of you committing serious harm to yourself or another - especially, though not exclusively, where children might be at risk.

Are Counsellors insured?

All accredited counsellors and Psychotherapists must have approved levels of Professional Liability Insurance. This is also a requirement of their accredited membership of the BACP.


What does a Psychotherapist do?

A Psychotherapist works with people who have emotional, behavioural, psychological or mental difficulties. The work is mainly to encourage the client to talk and explore their feelings, beliefs and thoughts, and often, their childhood.

It is a process which seeks to help the person gain an increased capacity for choice, through which the individual becomes more autonomous and self determined. As a result the work is often long term, sometimes more than once a week.

Psychotherapeutic approaches may be based on scientific, humanist, psychoanalytical or philosophical.

What does a Counsellor do?

A counsellor works in much the same way as a psychotherapist, in terms of encouraging the client to talk and explore their feelings, beliefs and thoughts with the hope that in doing so, the client will gain an increased capacity for choice.

Counsellors will generally work with the client on specific issues or problems such as a relationship difficulty, or an anxiety about a work problem, such as being made redundant or being bullied at work. Often the work is short term and solution focused.

What does a Psychologist do?

A Psychologist is a general term for someone who has studied Psychology, usually to degree level. A Clinical Psychologist will have done further training to be able to administer Psychological Tests e.g. personality tests or intelligence tests.

Clinical Psychologists diagnose and treat disorders. Psychologists are scientists and base their diagnoses and treatments on statistical evidence. There are also specialists such as Forensic Psychologists and Educational Psychologists.

What does a Psychiatrist do?

A Psychiatrist works within a medical framework and will have trained as a Doctor first before specialising. Psychiatrists diagnose and treat disorders. Only Psychiatrists and Doctors can prescribe medication.

How do I choose the right sort of help?

There are many types of what are generally know as “talking therapies” from which to choose. In some ways it doesn’t really matter which one you choose, as long as it’s you that makes the choice about the way in which you feel you would like to work.

Unless you have strong feelings about a particular model, one view is that the theoretical approach is less important than the quality of the Counsellor. By far the best way to decide this is to trust your instincts. so - ask yourself the question, “ would you be able to tell this particular person intimate details about yourself and your life? Would you feel safe talking to the person, and do you feel you could be completely open? If the answers are “yes” then the counsellor is probably right for you.


How many sessions do I need?

There is no rule about how many sessions a person needs and each case is different. But generally, counsellors and therapists will usually review things with you after six sessions.

What has been achieved can be discussed at this point and a decision re more sessions or a break will be agreed.

There is no rule!


What does it cost?

Counsellors can offer a range of charges although many will have a fixed session price. Charges should always be discussed at the outset of Counseling (usually before the sessions have actually begun when first contact is made).

(Robert's appointment charges are negotiated to suit individual circumstances)


What if I can't make an appointment?

It depends on the Counsellor, but this will be agreed at the first session when Terms and Charges should be clearly discussed.
Typically any cancellation with less than 24 hours notice is charged at the full session cost.


If you have any more questions, or would like any further details please call Robert or email riverclinic@mac.com

Counselling Cheltenham , and other areas in Gloucestershire including GloucesterStroudCirencester

Relationship Counselling Gloucester, and other areas in Gloucestershire including CheltenhamStroudCirencester

Counsellor Stroud, and other areas in Gloucestershire including GloucesterCheltenhamCirencester